I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I'm just crazy horny about you
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
