sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
