shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
