Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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