How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize