i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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