I think i peed on brittanys purse
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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