he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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