I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Randomize
