The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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