We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
