im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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