I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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