He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
this beer tastes like vomit already
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
