I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
