dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Randomize
