Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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