We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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