We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
