let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Randomize
