You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
