Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
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