There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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