She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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