i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize