WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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