butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize