There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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