Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Then you guys just all showered together...?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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