ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
My feet surprised me
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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