I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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