was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
