I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
