There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
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i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
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We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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