college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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