so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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