My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
