You're completely useless in the revolution.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Randomize