new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Randomize
