So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
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After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
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So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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