Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
