This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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