Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
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I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
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We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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