I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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