Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize