college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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