the condom got lost in my hair
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize