Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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