would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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