the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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