If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize